2
1st. (21st). Thursday. Wind and rain all the a.m. Wind day and night with occasional sunshine in the p.m.
3
The Xmas holidays ended at 8 a.m. this morning. University exercises began from 9. Recit. usual.
4
This morning Dr. Garland made a few appropriate remarks on begining the new year with renewed purposes.
6
2nd. (22nd). Friday. Cold and gloomy. Sleeted a little in the morning.
7
Recit. usual. Received a letter from Mrs. Gabard to whom I had sent a Xmas card.
9
3rd. (23rd). Saturday. Cold, cloudy.
10
Recit. usual. Cut the Society.
11
Cleansed the room from 3 to 4 p.m.
13
4th. (24th). Sunday. Cold but bright.
14
Attended the W.E S.S. and the morning service. Bro. Brown preached a very fine sermon. He said that "to kill the time" is a most dreadful thing one can say or do; that our greatest need, however, is not forming new resolutions, nor is it the proper appreciation of the value of time, but the prompt execution of our resolutions.
15
After dinner went to Watkin's Hall to hear Dr. Kelly's speech on "Our City." He showed these points:
16
1. The number of arrests for crimes during the past ten years has not increased in proportion to the rapid increase of the population.
17
2. 5 out 7of the entire reading population of the city are women. In a public school some time ago, there were 11 boys to 42 girls in the graduates.
18
3. Nashville must have at least 20 night schools to meet the educational need of those boys who can not attend day schools.
19
4. Bible and books on ethics are altogether non-used in all public schools. The moral and spiritual training of the young are thus thrown upon the shoulders of parents and pastors.
20
5. There are 6 churches with 1000 average sittings; 14 churches with 500 sittings; and 35 with 300 sittings. Only about 2/3 of this sitting capacity, 23,500, are occupied. Only 1/6 of the population goes to church.
21
6. There are about 31,000 S.S. pupils between the ages from 3 to 25. Less than 1/2 of this number attends S.S.
22
Then he proposed to have free discussion in regard to what ought to be done for the promotion of the moral and spiritual force of the city in the coming Sunday afternoon meetings.
23
Spent nearly 4 hrs. after the Sunday Miss. Meeting had been dismissed, in conversing with Yoshioka on following and other points.
24
1. Yoshioka said that he was surprized at the excessive critical spirit with which the Americans hear sermons. Compare this with my observations on the same soon after I came here. I told Mr. McIntosh in a letter: "I am surprised at the way in which a preacher is criticized here. The churchgoers seem to care more for the style than the spirit and the manner, than the matter of a preacher. I should think one can get a more attentive audience in a heathen country. However I admit that this is a necessary evil to an established system. When novelty shall have worn out and the Christian religion long settled, this kind of fault finding will no doubt enter an Eastern audience."
25
2. The small attendance to prayer meetings. Yoshioka said that, taking the size of a prayer meeting as a thermometer of the spiritual condition of the Ch. he was disappointed at finding only a handful of people at the prayer meeting in the W.E. Ch. We need not go to W.E Ch. to find out this. At this evening's S.M.M. there were only 12 boys present. Of this number 6 were candidates at that. Out of 42 theologues proper only 5 attended the meeting, and the majority of them were in their rooms. Wilson. the post graduate, helped to swell the whole audience to 12!
26
3. Yoshioka finely said that what the Wesleys and the first Methodists felt and practiced in daily life have now degenerated into mere dogmas. Very true. What Christ and his apostles felt and did in life have been fossilized into a dead and cold theology.
27
4. The doctrine of Trinity. On this, my opinion follows: The Bible says "God sent his only begotten Son" into the world. Our Savior, by life, work, and death proved this. Therefore I believe Him to be such. I can not, however, tell how He is the Son of God any more than I can, how God is God. But I prefer the Trinitarian view of Christ to the Unitarian view. Why? Not because the former is more convincing, but because the latter is less satisfactory. Again, the Trinitarian doctrine is the doctrine of the church universal. Therefore, unless some other doctrine can convince me, beyond doubt, of the falsity of the now orthodoxal view, I am perfectly willing to go with the majority. An illustration:
28
Last summer, when I boarded at Mr. Irvin's, I found that his clock was 15 min. slower than mine. Which was right, mine or his? I knew both his and my time was not correct. But I at once adjusted my time to his. Why? Not because his time was correct (it may have been) but because my time was as incorrect. Besides, the clock regulated all the household affairs-sleep, work and meals. So I sacrificed no truth in adopting the clock time for convenience.
30
5th. (25th). Monday. Bright and cold.
33
6th. (26th). Tuesday. Very heavy frost covered the ground in the morning - a lovely day.
35
Received a letter form Prof. Bonnell and Bell. The former in his letter says. "All things considered, my present opinion is that you would do well to return to Shanghai."
36
I feel disappointed. I feel the sting of dependency on the support of others. I feel the inconvenience of poverty. I wish I had at least a few hundred dollars in my pocket; I would not, then, have to leave America before having obtained a more thorough college training. I would borrow some money, it may be from Spencer for another year's stay, if I knew how I was going to return it. But I would not go into debts at haphazard. I must go therefore!
37
View the matter from another point. I believe in God; I believe in His providence. Full many a time, things seemed to go against my wishes and hopes. Yet they turned out to my best interest. Cease murmuring, then!
38
I showed the letter to Yoshioka. He seemed pleased, nay, delighted, at what is to me a disappointment. Very natural.
39
How far wrong or rather wicked my conjecture of Yoshioka's feeling was, let the following narrative tell:
40
At about 8:30 p.m. Yoshioka came to my room. In course of talk he gave me very kind and faithful religious but practical counsel. I sum up the whole thus:
41
Yosh. "Do you feel disappointed?"
42
I. "Yes, not much, though. I had expected to return to Shanghai next summer, and, but for Dr. Allen's promises, I would not have given any serious thought to the plan of staying here another year."
43
Yosh. "You seem to have very little inclination to go back to China."
44
I. "None whatsoever. Nothing but my duty to the China Mission constrains me to go there. China has no attraction for me."
45
Yosh. "That won't do. If you enter the ministry from no stronger motive than your sense of duty, you had better quit it. You will soon get tired of preaching, no matter where, if you don't have 'love for God' as your motive. The cold 'sense of duty' does not hold very long. If you have this love for God, you will love to work anywhere. Pray for this love and have it, else you will surely fail as a preacher."
46
I thank God for this plain and faithful advice. I must have "love for God" indeed!
48
7th. (27th). Wednesday. Bright and cold. Cloudy late in the p.m.
51
8th. (28th). Thursday. Rained all day long. Very cold.
54
9th. (29th). Friday. Rained most of the day.
57
10th. Saturday. Gloomy and cold. Rained in the night.
60
11th. Sunday. Rain, wind, cold.
61
Got up at 12:30 p.m. Taught the Pen S.S. as usual.
63
12th. Monday. Cloudy and very cold. Therm. between 24 or 25. Snowed some in the night.
65
Mrs. Baxter, the lady from whom I have so often received timely supplies, sent me ＄15 through Dr. Baskerville, as usual.
67
13th. Tuesday. Cloudy most of the a.m. Very bright and cold in the p.m.
70
14th. Wednesday. Cold but a lovely day.
71
On account of Mrs. McTyier's death early this morning the university exercises of the day were suspended.
73
15th.Thursday. Cloudy, dampt, cold all day long. Rained in the night.
74
'Exercises suspended. Wrote to Hal-whose letter I received this morning-to Bell and to Prof. Bonnell Asked the last gentleman to give me some directions in regard to the expenses necessary to my return.
75
At 2:30 the funeral service was conducted in Bishop McT.'s residence. A large number of the university students of all departments attended outside of the house. At about 3:30 the remains of Mrs. McT. were escorted to the campus grave yard, and there buried by the side of those of the Bishop. The rites were very solemn but simple.
76
For the first time, met Mrs. Baxter.
78
16th. Friday. Cold-cloudy most of the day.
79
At 2:30 p.m. went to Negro Baptist Ch. to hear Dr. J.C. Price, a "Black Demosthenes," on "the Future of the Negro". The sum and substance of his argument was this:
80
1. The greatest thing in the world is mind. The Negro must prove that he has mind like other people before he can hope for a future. Now, during the past 25 years, the progress of the Negro in material possessions, in moral qualities, in intellectual achievements, has sufficiently proved that he has mind power like others.
81
2. The prejudice against the Negro is not due to the color but to the condition. Change poverty into wealth, vice into virture, ignorance into intelligence.－in short, change condition, the prejudice will disappear.
82
3. Link your hands with that of God. Then work! Show by your work that you have mind. Look squarely into the face of the world and say "Give me nothing, because I am black; deny me nothing because I am black."
83
4. America is the home of the Negro. Here he must work out his destiny. Emigration is nonsense. Amalgamation is a dream. The great race problem can never be settled by a nonsense or a dream. The elevation of the condition-moral. mental and material-this and this only can settle the question.
84
Indeed he was eloquent. The lecture was full of humour. Dr. Price is a full blooded Negro. He is a living argument against the opinion that the Negro, unless mixed, has no mental powers.
86
17th. Saturday. Cloudy with sunshine at intervals.
89
18th. Sunday. Cloudy and cold.
90
Taught the Pen. S.S. as usual.
92
19th. Monday. Cold and cloudy. Fair p.m.
95
20th. Tuesday. Cloudy and cold.
98
21st. Wednesday. Cloudy-Rained.
99
Exam in Syst. Theol. Felt chill and headache.
101
22nd. Thursday. Cloudy, rained some.
102
From early morning suffered from chill and headache. Went to chemistry exam and got through with it in great difficulty. Came back to room with inexpressible pain and fever and chill and headache. Went to bed directly from 1:30 p.m. Sick all the p.m. and the night. Yoshioka showed himself very kind.
104
23rd. Friday. Bright.
105
Felt a deal better-only weak
106
In the night Yoshioka came up. We had following dialogue on special divinal call of the ministry:
107
I. "I do not believe that God, in every instance, specially calls a man to the ministry."
109
I. "Here are two men. One is inferior to the other not only in intellect but also in moral and spiritual qualities. Now the first one enters the ministry. He says he is divinely called. If God called a minister how is it that He calls the one less qualified? Why is it that there is actually a large majority of preachers who are inferior to laity in every qualification? They are neither holier in life, nor stronger in faith nor richer in work than many a layman. If God calls preachers, He would not call such."
110
Yosh. "But such men enter the ministry as they would any other profession-in order to get a living. They are not divinely called. Those who enter the ministry purely for Christ, sacrificing their interests, if needs be, are really called."
111
I. "That's what I say. Those who enter the ministry because they can get a living-I do not believe their claim to divine call. For instance, here are two appointments, one paying ＄500 and the other ＄1000. A preacher takes the fatter appointment and says to the world that he goes there because God calls thither. I do not believe it. He goes to the better paid place not because God calls but because gold calls. Now I do not blame any man for taking ＄1000 instead of ＄500. But I blame him for attributing his own choice to the call of God. I do not blame anybody for entering the ministry as a profession. But I blame him for calling a professional call, a divine call."
112
Yosh. "The ministry is not a profession, to begin with. To enter it as a profession is therefore wrong."
113
I. "No. The ministry is a profession in old Christian countries. A man entering it as a profession is no more wrong than one who goes into law or medicine as a profession. The plain fact is that thousands in England and America go into the ministry as a profession and prove themselves useful."
114
Yosh. "But this is an evil."
116
Here we stopped. I must think more over this.
118
24th. Saturday. Cold-snowed all the morning. Cleared up p.m.
119
A fine scene in the night-the moon and the snow. Reviewed. Wrote to Dr. Allen.
121
25th. Sunday. Bright.
122
Attended the W.E. S.S. and the morning service. Taught the Pen. S.S. class as usual. Talked with Jacob on the special call to ministry. He also holds that the ministry is not a profession. My opinion on the subject is follows:
123
1. There are two calls to the ministry, one professional, another divine.
124
2. Those who go into the ministry at some sacrifice or those who do so though they have means and talents to be successful in other occupations,-those are divinely called.
125
3. Those who enter the ministry to make a living are professionally called. They ought not to claim a divine call.
126
4. One ought not to enter the ministry as a make-living profession. But he who does so may be perfectly honest and prove himself a useful vessel to the Lord.
128
26th. Monday. Bright.
129
Exam in Ch. Polity. Reviewed.
130
Cook showed me a letter from a boy in Emory Col., Oxford, to the effect that some ＄260 have been collected in the Y.M.C.A. to help me thro the college, should I go there. What does this mean? I must wait and see. No doubt Dr. Allen has something to do in this.
131
By the way, in my letter to Dr. A., I told him my opinion in regard to Corea. As for my "another year's plan" I said: "In his letter Prof. B. advised me to go back to China this summer. I take this not only as his private counsel, but as the expression of the opinion of all my Shanghai patrons including you, of course. I submit to the voice of my superiors."
133
27th. Tuesday. Cloudy and warm.
134
Exam in English. Went to bed early.
136
28th. Wednesday. Rained most of the a.m.
139
29th. Thursday. A regular, lovely spring day.
142
30th. Friday. Cloudy. From. 1 p.m. rained all the p.m. and night.
143
Exam in History of Methodism. Suffered from bad cold. Reviewed hard.
145
31st. Saturday. Cloudy all the a.m. with short intervals of pale sunshine. Warm windy, unpleasant day. Strong wind-west-hard rain all the p.m.
146
Exam in Economics. Cold-became worse. Felt ill all the day. Reviewed in the night. Felt exhausted.
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