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◈ 윤치호일기 (1892년) ◈
◇ 11월 ◇
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1. 11월 1일

2
1st. Tuesday. A rather warm day.
 
3
Felt unwell most of the day.
4
Received a letter from dear W. Spencer. Was delighted to hear from him.
5
After supper, I felt so bad that nothing but sense of duty made me to attend the meeting. Dr. Candler preached a splendid sermon on the simple faith of the Philipian Jailor, though I was too sleepy to hear all of it. "The healthiest religious man" the Dr. said, "is he who least asks how he believes or feels."
6
Brother Joe Bell conducted the after-service. He showed himself a master of the situation by, instead of wasting the time in "pumping" testimonies, setting all the Christians both men and women at work in personal engagement with unconverted persons.
7
Shipp took a decided step to God's side. So did Freeman Jones. L.L.W. no decision.
 
 

2. 11월 2일

9
2nd. Wednesday. Warm and Cloudy.
 
10
1. This morning Dr. Candler in the Bible Class, took occasion to let out a piece of his mind on theology and theological seminaries. "I would not", said he "advise any one to go to a seminary. I have never seen one go there without coming out hurt. The seminary training tends and do make preachers stiff, artificial and dry." He seemed to aim his gun hard at Dr. Tillet when he referred to an arid sermon of a theological "Dean". I had known of old that Dr. Candler despised theology and therefore the Wesley H Department.
11
2. Dr. Candler preached on the withdrawal of Divine influence from a resisting soul. "That is the darkness that can be felt when a man finds sining a necessity."
12
3. Nath led the after-service. Stephens and L.L.W. went to the altar twice but no decision-God help them!
13
4. Nothing makes me more impatient than the dragging of a religious meeting to indefinite time to "pump" and "extort" the "talks" unless it be long public prayers. I remember Dr. Tillet one morning in conducting the chapel exercises, read the 20th Chapt. of Exodus and then offered a 15 minute prayer in which he commented on every one of the Ten Commandments asking the Lord to help the boys to keep it. Since I came here I have been often scandalized by the lecture-and-preaching prayers of Dr. More; the multipication or mathematical prayers of Professor Peed; the balanced and rhetorical prayers of Dr. Callaway-and too long to be pious. The reason why Dr. Candler's prayers, even when they are long, are good, seems to be that he talks so much common sense.
14
5. Among the hard and contemptible characters in the college I might put down Gus Thomlinson; Baxtrum; Steele.
15
Gus is an intelligent, bright and studious young man. He is however, unspeakably proud; deeply skeptical in, and perfectly indifferent to, high moral or spiritual experiences, and (therefore) heartless beyond degree. If he ever gets religion, it would not be of much account.
16
Baxtrum-a poppin jay.
17
Steele-Plebian in appearance; dull in intellect; turpid in moral.
18
I may be mistaken in my opinion concerning them. I may be prejudiced against them-as in case of Gus and Baxtrum on account of their "I-am-your-superior" behavior toward me. Whenever if they come out better men than they now are I shall change my opinion-and that very quick.
 
 

3. 11월 3일

20
3rd. Thursday. A warm and cloudy day-an elegant night.
 
21
Received a letter from Miss Issie. It came like a shower on parched ground. Felt sickly all the day.
22
Dr. Candler preached on prompt decision according to right judgment. "The great difficulty-in the crisis which may decide our whole destiny is that it is so much like other days, there being, as a rule, nothing to notify us of the presence of a crucial moment. Hence the importance of being in habit of doing right on all occasions." "The latitude or longitude of a locality is settled by its disance from a standard point. The latitude or the longitude of a man's character is determined by his distance from Christ."
23
One of his sayings that well illustrate the Dr.'s principle of action was this: "When a man has the entire responsibility-he ought to have the entire authority to decide issues in the light of his best judgment and honest conscience."
24
L.L. Wiggins took the decided step and joined the church. A thrill of joy seemed to electrify many a heart-at least it did mine. May he be a chosen vessel for the Lord!
 
 

4. 11월 4일

26
4th. Friday. A beautiful day.
 
27
Nath led the Y.M.C.A. prayer meeting. He said "This here command to 'bridle your longing' does not mean you ought not to say anything, but you ought to say what is of some account. When you bridle your horse you don't want him to do nothing but to work in right way." "Boys we are going to upslide or backslide or one."
28
It sounded good and strange, too, to hear Luxley exhort others "go our way rejoicing together to heaven"
29
Dr. More preached. Many boys went to the altar to be prayed for, among whom were O.P. Wilcox and Gus Thomlinson. God bless them is my sincere prayer. Nath led the after-service.
30
Edmonson, a young preacher, after a long talk about the sin of indifference he had shown during the meeting, said in choking voice, "Boys, I would die here tonight, if that will save some of you." I call this kind of declaration a nonsense and a hyperbole. There is no use of talking thus, because he knows that he needs not die. The idea of a man doing nothing (according to his own confession) in personal work to convert people and then declaring that he would die to save them! I know he was honest; but I know, too, that he was thoughtless.
31
A most lovely night.
 
 

5. 11월 5일

33
5th. A beautiful day.
 
34
-All of the a.m. in the Society.
35
In the afternoon called on Mrs. Candler, and got some flowers. On the way home, stepped into Brother Hay's and there spent more than an hour in the company of Mrs. Hays, Miss Kate Hays and of Miss Bessie Joiner. By the way Miss Kate is said to be the fastest girl in the place. I heard this word, fast, used before but never until this evening learned that it applies to a girl who allows liberty to boys to kiss and hug.
36
1. Lottie Berry is a little girl about 6 or 7 years old. She talks well. She is as spoiled as a spoiled egg. Being neither exceptionally pretty nor at all sweet, I never took fancy to her. Possibly the precocious child discovered this: She always says " I don't like Mr. Yun". So far so good. For the week or two past I have tried to win her over by kindness in the shape of candies and indulgent endurance of her frequent botherings. No use, after all. She asks me for candies ect. and when she gets through with them, my kindness is requited by that harsh declaration "I don't like Mr. Yun". This afternoon she hit my head two three times unprovoked. Soon afterwards she asked me for chewing gum. On my telling her that she behaved ugly to me and that I would give her some gum if she promised to be a sweet girl, she did so. Before the gum was half chewed, she said, to my disgust, "I will hit you again. That I will". I was amazed at her ingratitude. If I ever doubted the truth of original sin, the wickedness of this child's heart peeping through her petty words and actions scatter my doubts to the winds.
37
2. Compare this little girl with Faith, the bright and sweet girl of Professor Harris, or with Sarah Br., or with Mary McClure-all nearly of the same age. We cannot then help believing in the hereditary transmission of culture and refinement. it practices no better than I. This much I do. I am ready to help anybody, however mean he may have been to me, who stands in need of help.
38
3. Dr. Candler no doubt in joke asked me if I were going to marry before leaving America. "No Sir" said I. "Why not?" "Because nobody would have me." "I do not know that. You haven't tried it" the Dr. said.
39
The five words in my answer contain a truth more bitter than wormwood. The question is not whether I like or dislike to marry, but that no American girl of social standing, of education and of beauty would condescend to marry me. If one did, have I check to ask her to leave happy America to live in the dirty habitations of Corea? No! Ten thousand times No! What hurts me is not the improbability but the impossibility of the event.
 
 

6. 11월 6일

41
6th. Sunday. A lovely day.
 
42
Dr. Glenn preached in the morning on real freedom being found only in Christian manhood or womanhood.
43
1. As I knelt to pray this morning in the church the following thought presented itself:-Here I am. I am enjoying blessings that millions of my countrymen know nothing of. I am in the light of pure religion; intellectual freedom: political liberty. They are groping in the darkness of superstition; ignorance; political slavery. Heaven grant me the way to spread my measure of light among them! God forbid that I should use the moral and intellectual advantages I have received for my selfish ends and not for the good of my fellow men in darkness!
44
2. Love! I do not know what it is, therefore I don't talk about it. Indeed, great many a person who talks about
45
3. I have learned to love the Epistle to the Hebrews. Its last three chapters are specially fine. I do not like john's Epistles. They read too much like a doting grandma's exhortations.
46
4. Wrote to Miss Fannie and Mrs. Abbie H. To the latter I said truthfully "Forget you! I can not if I will; I will not if I can".
47
5. Dr. Glenn preached. The protracted meeting closed tonight. I would rather see the service continue a few days longer, though its close pleased the flesh by saving between 2 and a half and 3 hours every night to my studies. Brother Budd conducted the after-service. Among those who published their resolution to live a Christian life hereafter were (1) Ed Stephens; (2) Moreland Speer; (3) Thom Day; (4) Eugene Eaks; (5) Wimpey. O.P. Wilcox told me he would try to do better. Shall pray for these boys.
48
6. Some boys do not go to church at all and answer two churches Monday morning. Some others just peep into the church and then go away, but answer churches. In short they lie-and some glory in this. Fools! Yet they call Christians hypocrites.
49
7. L.L.Wiggins and Shipp offered public prayers tonight. They were among the sweetest prayers I ever heard.
50
8. The cup of strong coffee I drank at supper in Mrs. Hayes' has given me a deal of discomfort tonight. By the way Mrs. Hayes does not seem to be a mother of sensible and controling religion. To this may be due the fastness of her daughters and rowdiness of her boys.
51
9. Mrs. Candler told me that Dr. Candler is so much in the habit of begging for the College that he often cries out in sleep "Who will give me10 or5?"
 
 

7. 11월 8일

53
8th. Tuesday. Rained hard last night. Wet all day.
 
54
The disagreeable weather in addition to my physical weakness made me feel wretched all the day.
55
1. Today is the national election day for the President of the United States.
56
2. Yesterday afternoon, I am told, the senior class elected me a Senior. The honor of being a senior is nothing to me. But I feel grateful for and proud of the good will and kind regards which prompted the "1893" boys to this generous action. Having, however, never taken any regular course that entitles me to the senior-ship, and being too proud to assume an honor undeserved, I sent in a note of declination. How the boy will act on my refusal, it remains to be seen.
57
Dr. Candler advised me not to refuse it. He said that I having taken so many senior studies and being short only in Mathematics, the Trustees may likely give me a B.S. dipioma. "Identify yourself with the class 1893 for their sake. Their interest in you will make them broader men."
58
3. Dr. Candler this morning told the boys "Some people think they are so pure that they may damn their piety by voting. Such folks grow in grace backward."
 
 

8. 11월 9일

60
9th. Wednesday.
 
61
So exhausted I felt last night that a nap intended to be a temporary rest was involuntarily extended to a nights long sleep. Got up, however, this morning much refreshed. Rain hard in the a.m. More less all the day.
62
Rain, cold, mud and darkness make the night "dreadfully" bad. The prayer meeting was thinly attended-no ladies, of course, and no men like ladies. Dr. Candler, after a sensible and Candlerly talk on the importance of the church to the spiritual welfare of Christians baptized Fred Byce-a Sub-Fr.-and Richardson-a Senior. L.L. Wiggins formally joined the church with them. The scene reminded me of the time when I received baptism in the A.C.C. chapel in the presence of a number of missionaries. I felt as if I were rebaptized. God help me that my life and work may do honor to my baptismal vows.
63
The prayer meeting was a "good one-quiet, sensible, brotherly and Christian" as Dr. Candler put it.
64
Boys are making a deal of howling and yelling to celebrate the coming victory of Cleveland, they being almost certain of it. The few Third-partyites, Battle, Wimpey, Harper, must be very cold-being "snowed under" so heavily in the election.
65
An officer "Sir, let us strike the iron while it's hot". Napoleon "Nay, we ought to make the iron hot by striking." -Make opportunity-
 
 

9. 11월 11일

67
11th. Friday. A lovely day.
 
68
Put every inch of spared time in writing the saluditory speech.
69
The Intersociety impromptue Debate came off tonight. Well attended. Enthusiastic crowd-Professor Bradly presided. In the Phi Gamma Hall. My saluditory speech was as well received as my B.U. speech was in the V.U. Chapel in 1890.
70
The subject resolved: That the marking system should be abolished.
 
71
The affirmative side was held by the Phi Gam's and the negative by the Fews. The affirmative side said:
72
1. This system compels boys to break down their health by hard study.
73
2. Fosters the habit of cheating.
74
3. Make boys small and childish by compelling them to study for marks and not for knowledge.
75
4. Substitutes (1) Snap-examinations; (2) Monthly examinations; (3) Note system.
 
76
Negative arguments:
77
1. Laws not made for the good but for restraining and controlling the bad. So is the marking system. It does not hurt good boys who will study, marks or no marks; while it benefits the lazy by compelling them to study.
78
2. Those who will cheat will cheat under any system.
79
3. The system instead of fostering the habit of childish dependence, makes boys independent and strong by cherishing the spirit of self-reliance.
80
4. If marking system makes boys cheat for daily marks, will they not do the same for snap examinations etc.?
81
5. This system tends to builds up the habit of study in those who would not study except compelled.
82
The Fews won. Tom D. Ellis made the best speech on our side.
 
 

10. 11월 12일

84
12th. Saturday. A lovely day.
 
85
Had a good debate in our society. The question: "Resolve that religion is essential to temporal success." Nath. and I took the negative side. But when we got through I was converted to the other side. For:-
86
Religion seems not essential to temporal success in isolated cases. But a deeper survey of the question shows that religion is essential to any kind of success, in all cases, individual or national. For no religion, no foundation of morality and law; no moral and law, no safety to person and property; no safety, no prosperity of the people; no prosperity, no success to individuals and hence no success to nations. The success of the wicked and irreligious may conflict with this view, yet if there were no safety granted to their person and purse by the laws and honesty of the people inculcated and cherished by religion, how could they succeed? The irreligious may deny that they owe anything to religion but the fact remains.
87
After dinner, spent some time with Bell chatting about old A.C.C. reminiscenses.
88
Called on Mrs. Candler, supped there.
89
Called on Munroe and Shipp at Col. Wimpey's. Stayed there to pull candies. There were Misses Lucy Pattillo (a pouting nothing) , Birdie Wimpey (a good looking girl) and Grace W. I liked the last best because she was kind to me.
90
I: "Miss Grace, are you a Third party-man?"
91
Grace: "No; I am going to put up a party of my own."
92
I: That must be a graceful party. I shall like to join it".
 
 

11. 11월 13일

94
13th. Sunday. A lovely day.
 
95
Professor Bradley preached this morning a gem of sermon on the text "All things work together for the good of them that love God."
96
Received a card from N.H.D. Wilson. Answered him. I love him! I pray for him.
97
After the S.S. went up to Mr. Steward's to see Misses Sallin and Emmie for some flowers. They have the finest site and the best hot-house in the town. These two ladies have always been very kind to me. Their complaints that I do not visit them often is a higher compliment to me than direct invitations. Their father was once a prominent man in the church. But his criminal use of the missionary treasure of which he was the keeper, when brought to light, expelled him from the church commission. I am sorry for the old man. His daughter are earnest Christian workers.
98
Dr. Candler preached on real freedom in keeping the eternal laws, moral and physical, God has set up.
 
 

12. 11월 16일

100
16th. Wednesday.
 
101
A most lovely day after the rain we had the day before last.
102
Dr. Candler led the prayer meeting. Gave a splendid talk on the last part of the last verse of the 5th Chapter St. Mark. The substance was as follows.
103
"Our Lord commanded that something should be given to the little girl whom He had restored to life through his supernatural power. Why did He not keep her in health by the same power? The fact is God never gives us a superhuman power where human power will do. Our religion is a supernatural gift to be utilized in natural life. A religion that does not make ordinary duties better discharged is a supernatural power wasted. Revival influences ought to be manifest on the farmer's field, behind the merchant's counter, in the student's recitation. A church that reports hundred conversions plus shortage in missionary collections, in preacher's salary etc. is not to be congratulated. The Niagara Fall with all of its tremendous potential energy has so far been merely a profitless show. It does not spin a yard for the clothing of the naked; nor does it grind a handful of corn for the feeding of the hungry. So is a revival a useless spectacle of spiritual power-a revival that does not make men and women better in the family and out of it."
104
I must read more. Shall try to give the hours between 11 and 12 in the night to reading.
105
He is the loneliest who has a guilty secret and an accusing conscience.
106
A sensitive man is like water in a thin flack-easily cooled and easily heated.
 
 

13. 11월 17일

108
17th. Thursday. Warm all the a.m. and the greater part of the p.m. Rain hard between 6 and 8.
 
109
Having prepared my lessons, I shall employ a few moments in taking a rough sketch of my present surroundings:
110
The clock has just counted 9. A perfect silence in and out, broken only by the measured beats of eavesdrops and the occasional whistles of distant trains. The flicker of the unstirred fire indicates the warmness of the night. The table, at which I am sitting, is placed against the right angle formed by the southern and the eastern walls of the room. A thin black blanket (given me by Mr. Kim Ok Qiun) covers the table. On it and against the angle is a large cigar box which contains my inkstand, a mucilage bottle, a pen-case, an orange-wood match holder (a gift of dear Mrs. Candler) and a small glass mustard barrel holding chrysanthemums, pink and gold, white and crimson. On the box-lid set against the walls is pasted the picture of Seney Hall. Above it rests the photo of Miss Issie R. The precious picture of dear Mrs. Hoss set in a Japanese photo-frame is hung on the southern wall. My student lamp which has been a faithful companion ever since I came to America gives an excellent light. Scattered over the face of table I see Tennyson, introduction to Chemistry, Human Body Geometry, Answers to College Algebra, The State, a pencil, tablet, a ruler, a blotter, a pencil, a knife, a pocket dictionary, a hymn book and an atlas.
111
On my left, immediately next to the table is my dandy portable library-which, by the way, I got from Byron in Wesley Hall in exchange for a crazy rocking chair. Its uppermost shelf supports Websters Unabridged Dictionary and a few copies of Missionary Review. My Bible and Bible Studies and some copybooks in the 2d shelf. The third contains my school books plus a few others, among which are a copy of Japanese Life of Buddah, of Emerson's Essays, of Walker's Economy, and the last volume of Macaulay's History. Some Chinese books on the lowest shelf. The whole library is on a square box (I got it from Branham's store) in which is my oil can, a pair of shoes and some old papers.
112
The door is shut. On a nail this side of the door frame is hung a lady's bustle which a man in Shady Dale gave to me. I use it as a towel-rack. A pair of old pants with holes, an overcoat and an outing shirt hung on the back of the door. Near the latter, against the northern wall is a small, low box (thrown away by Brother Hearns) which I use as a wash-stand. The cavity of the box being partitioned into two I keep my blacking-box in the upper and my rubber shoes in the lower cavity. By the stand is the water-bucket and a tin tub.
113
The window in the northern wall, I keep shaded to prevent Lottie from looking in and bothering me. Right close to the window I keep a zink trunk bought in Nashville. Not far from the trunk and in the north-west corner is my bed. One of the sheets was given me by Bell who received two pairs of sheets from Mrs. Towns. The quilt was once owned by Abe, a Japanese friend, who boarded in Wesley Hall the first two years of my stay there. The counterpaign was given me when I first went to the Hall. A pair of Indian clubs stands between the bed and the trunk: I use them for exercise in daytime and for defence (should occasion demand!) in the night.
114
The window in the western wall is of great importance to the room. Near it is placed my Japanese trunk. Close by the trunk I see a large pasteboard shoe-box used to keep dirty clothes in. In the south-west corner of the room is a heap of chips for kindling fire with. Next to this and against the southern wall is my coalbox, conveniently close to the fire place.
115
A large, stupid, looking glass is on the manthpiece reflecting a few flowers in a small ink-bottle. The space of the wall between the mantlepiece and the corner where my writing tablet is located is occupied by a paper-letter bag, and the calendar sent me by dear Mrs. A.H.
116
A rocker with its legs all tied, and a wash-stand which I use as a moveable desk occupy the middle of the room. Four common-place pictures; one of a ship-wreck, one of a little girl reading or rather playing with a cat, one of a young lady in maiden meditation, and one of a little boy feeding young chickies. These belong to Mrs. Berry.
117
Such are my in-and-out surroundings tonight. Nothing luxurious but everything quiet and comfortable. This night next year where shall I be? in what surroundings? doing what? As my school-days-only between now and next June-are drawing to the close I feel more and more the preciousness of their privileges and pleasures.
118
Suffered all day from a sense of bodily exhaustion.
119
Unless business or duty demands, avoid going into a company where I am not as welcome to say the least, as any of the rest
 
 

14. 11월 19일

121
19th. Saturday. A lovely day through rather a little windy.
 
122
Had a jolly time in the society this a.m. We invited the Phi Gammas to a spelling match. I sat down at the third word (poultice) : I spelt it poltie. Whop Harris of P.G. and McDonnal of Few stood from begining to end. But the word "Viviparous" knocked down Whop while John Callaway on our side knocked down "Viviparous". though C. did not start until toward the last. So we won the game.
123
Everybody was in high spirit. Nath said "Mr. Pres. I move that a committee including myself should be appointed to make four big fires and have an old fashion slavery nodding until the Phi Gammas come." We took up a collection ($1) to buy a bushel of apples from a wagon which was just then passing by the Hall, to "set up" the crowd of both societies.
124
After 3 p.m. took a very refreshing nap until 5:30. The supper over, I went up to Andrew Hall and enjoyed the prayer meeting. From 8 studied Geometry with Boland till 10:30. Then came home.
125
A cold, beautiful night: the whole sky is a sheet of cloth of gold.
126
Hubert Bond is one of the most loyal members of Few.
127
This is all the more remarkable because I have never heard him debate since I have been here. He is a solid man, anyway.
128
A little girl or boy who has sense enough to cry and whine for no earthly reason than to be humored has sense enough to be whipped to quit crying and whining.
 
 

15. 11월 20일

130
20th, Sunday. A lovely day.
 
131
Attended the preacher's meeting and the worship as usual. Professor Harris preached a very good sermon on Faith, Courage and Knowledge.
132
Dined at Marvin Hall. After dinner, walked out to the Fall with Tom Kendal, Tom Shepherd and Smith E. Then Smith and myself went to the Rock On the way back to the S.S. I called on Mrs. Candler. When she heard that Mrs. Berry, who has been sick for some time, lets us boys into her bed-room, Mrs. Candler said, "She does!" "Well, she is so common that she does not know any better, I reckon. I do not think you can learn much of the home life of our civilization in her house." On the contrary I learn a great deal here. I learn how nicely a "streetcar driver" lives; how intelligent and virtuous a wife of "common" folks is: how cakes and pies are served at all meals: how we are asked to "take more" of meat or rice, or biscuit or pudding when our plates are already full.
133
This morning, Lottie, after having wantonly beaten a young chicken to death, came into the dining room and triumphantly exclaimed "Papa, I killed a dead chicken". You say human heart is naturally good?
134
At the invitation of Brother Baily, I took supper at Mr. Newton's house. It is the prettiest boarding house in the town. Mrs. Newton is a lady whom I can not help loving. She looks so kind, so unaffected, so motherly. Met a little young lady, Miss Walker, at Newton's. She gave me 1/10 of her finger-tips to be-shaken?-no, to be touched. Which showed that she is a typical specimen of those would-be fashionable girls whom we have the misfortune of meeting with in every American community. When I mentioned this to Mrs. Candler, she said "I don't like giving anybody my fingers only to shake. I like to give my full hand and a hearty squeeze." Isn't she a lovable, sensible, precious little woman?
135
The custom of calling even married ladies, old or young, by their maiden names by their servants and intimate neighbors is a pretty one. This is a Southern custom, I am told.
136
"Might is right" in international or interracial dealings? So I have always thought. But a maturer consultation modifies my views in this. For we can not say "might is right" in the overthrow of one nation or race by another unless the conquered is better in morals, religion, and intelligence, therefore more right than the conqueror. Compare India under the British rule with India under the native government or rather governments before the English conquest. Isn't America better off in the hand of the Anglo-Saxon than she ever was under or rather above the control of the Redman? Indeed it would be hard to instance a single case of the domination of one race over another but that we find the stronger has been almost always better or less corrupted in morals, religion and politics than the weaker. Thus we see that what seems to be a triumph of might over right is but a triumph of comparative-I don't say absolute-right over comparative wrong. So after all, right is might even in interracial dealings, isolated and minor exceptions of course admitted.
137
To return good for evil when we have the power to do otherwise is a Christian retaliation-Do!
 
 

16. 11월 21일

139
21th. Monday. Cloudy and gloomy. Felt bad all day long.
 
140
At the dinner table in the conversation between Brother Stone, the beef man, Mrs. B., the mother-in-law of Brother Berry, the following remarks attracted my attention.
141
Stone, "Brother Bigham, our P.E. gets1800 a year, more than I can make in ten years."
142
Mrs. B. "Yet preachers always grumble about money."
143
Stone. "They do. They hunt after paying circuits. Once I asked a preacher if he would like to locate in Shilo, so that he could farm and preach. He said 'You folks here do not pay much.' Why, we pay700 a year. They seem to look to the salary first and the salvation of souls last." etc etc.
144
Love of money belittles anybody; but it kills a preacher, so far as his influence goes. No wonder Dr. Candler and men of his type ever denounce the preachers who seek corner-lots.
 
 

17. 11월 24일

146
24th. Thursday.
 
147
College-exercises suspended on account of this being the national Thanksgiving day. An ideal winter day-clear, far off sky, sharp, bracing cold; chaste, lovable sunshine, neither voluptuous as that of a Spring day nor melting as that of Summer.
148
At 10 a.m. a thanksgiving service was held in the church. The building was cold, the crowd was shivering; no floral decorations; no choir songs. Everything seemed like frozen up. But Dr. Candler who led the service, soon warmed up himself and the audience. The first time I ever saw him read in the pulpit a fully written discourse.
149
He began by saying that the custom of observing a national thanksgiving day originated in New England-somewhere about 1621. That there has been an unreasonable prejudice in the south against the custom; but that the South is begining to enter into the spirit of this national occasion. Then he went on to enumerate the causes for which an American should be thankful:-
150
I. Material Prosperity. 1 Peace; 2 Plenty; 3 Health.
151
II. Moral and Spiritual Success. 1, An unusually peaceful and dignified presidential campaign, showing the sobermindedness of the people; 2. The defeat of the infernal La. lottery; 3. National philanthropy to Russia; 4. Missionary enterprizes and advancement; 5. Home churches in peace and prosperity; 6. Public educational interests advanced. Under this head he, among other things, said "Georgia alone has appropriated this year more than a million dollars on a common-school system. Georgia must have an 8 months system, for a common school running only 5 months is unable to secure a competent teacher." "Higher education must be in the hand of Christian organizations. State universities has proved a failure. To this the University of Mich. may be an exception; yet it is shot through and through with infidelism." "No less than20,000,000 has been given mostly in the North and North-west for higher education within "1892". I wish I could thank God for a goodly gift for education this side of the Mason and Dixon line. But, Alas! our people don't give as our brethren in the North. The richmen of the South are so young in their fortunes that they still use money on toys."
152
Bell (China) and I were, when in the A.C. College, on cordial terms in words and in deed. Since he came here, however, his often impudent obstinacy and obstinate impudence have somewhat alienated me from him; and his jealousy of me, him from me. His jealousy, said I? Yes. He gets blue over my success (as seen after the impromptu debate) and happy in my defeats. He seems to lose no chance for dropping some words here and some words there that tend to my discredit. What he does on my back I can't tell; but what he throws into my face is often provoking. A day or two ago he said "Yun, they say they will elect you the president of Few Society; No, I was joking" continued he, "you will never be the president of Few as long as you live. No! never in this world". Who said I was to be one? He simply thought aloud-the answer no doubt giving him a satisfaction. Many a time he made Lottie say at the table "I don't like Mr. Yun" to vex me until I stopped him. This morning, he persuaded little Luddie (my pet in the house) not to kiss me to gratify his meanness. He tries to make out that I was as dark skinned as he before I came to America! Fair complexioned I do not claim to be. But if what he says be true I must have been very dark indeed!
153
He has a good heart-capable of love and gratitude-and an observant mind. I hope we will be better friends when we meet in the East with no conflicting interest but a common cause against common foes-I shall, by God's help, retaliate as a Christian: Rejoice in his success and sympathize in his defeat, say good things of him every where, and hold my peace when I have no good things to say.
154
1. Honor bought is honor sold.
155
2. I would rather be the master of a few choice books than be the master of a large library.
156
Wrote to Mrs. E.B. Thompson, Nath's step-mother.
 
157
***
 
158
Took supper at Dr. Candler's.
159
Went to the concert. The first 25¢ I ever spent on an amusement of this sort. Enjoyed the entertainment. A provincial town-dried up town-saloon cursed town-like Cov-a man in a town of even this sort in America enjoys more comforts and luxuries of life than a rich man in the capital of Corea-
160
......................................
161
The proceeds of this concert were to go to the recovering the pulpit of the Cov. Meth. Church.
162
......................................
163
This program was given me by Miss Maggie Moore after the concert.
164
......................................
165
Walked home with Jim Marm.
 
 

18. 11월 25일

167
25th. Friday. Biting cold--morning and night.
 
168
This morning, received a note from dear Mrs. H. asking me to write an article on "all I know about the New Year Festival in Corea." "All I know about" it is very little and that very little isn't worth putting in a paper. But she bids me do it-how can I refuse? I shall try. If I fail, I shall fail trying. By the way, she never used my articles on Poe, on my America impressions, on Dr. Allen's Review. Is my writing tolerable enough to be put in her paper? Why doesn't she use them? Is it too poor? What does she want me to write another for?
169
Took supper with G., a Savannah boy, at his boarding house, Mrs. Smith's.
170
Attended the Fall term debate. Question: That national prohibition is preferable to local option." Fews-affirmative, P.G.'s-negative. The latter being more popular, P.G.'s won the debate. Marvin William, of Few, made the best speech. He has wit, grip and tact. He will make his way in the world. He is one of my best friends in the college.
171
None of the dozen secret fraternities has solicited my membership. This hurts me, not that I care to join any, but that the boys, in spite of their professed love and friendship for me, show their unwillingness to consider a Corean their equal-A disgrace, unutterable!
172
"I don't care!" This is often the language of helplessness or of impudence. In one case it is puny, in the other it is vulgar. We ought never to say this under any circumstance that is beyond our voluntary control-that we could not help if we did care. The language of true manhood in such a case whether said or thought should be "I do care. But since I can't help it, I shall face it".
 
 

19. 11월 26일

174
26th. Saturday. Cloudy a.m.
 
175
A lively debate in the Society on the question that the state board of arbitors should adjust the difficulties between capital and labor in mining, manufacturing and railroad industries. The negatives won the question.
176
On the nomination of Homer Bush I was elected the president for the ensuing month. It was an honor I never looked for much less sought for. This fact and my being not a member of any defined class make me feel prouder of the election. I would have resigned it, however, but for what Bell told me sometime ago in regard to the prospect of my ever attaining the position. Returning home, when I told Bell of the election, "They ought not to do that," was his answer! He meant it too.
177
This morning there were some Fews who manifested dissatisfaction at my election. Rob. Eax was one of them. I expect an unpleasant session next Saturday-I know something about Southern prejudice.
178
I see Dr. Allens life-size photo, which I presented to our Society, is nicely framed and hung opposite to that of R.E. Lee. It is no small honor to have one's picture on one of these sacred walls. In Dr. Allen's case, the honor is a reward of 34 years self-denial.
179
Supped at Mrs. Candler's. Oyster soup. In talking about Dr. Moore's preaching, I said, "I do not mind his preaching the same sermon twice". "Nor do I," replied Mrs. Candler. "It is so interesting". "Not that," said I, "but that I always fall into sleep under his preaching".
180
Enjoyed the praying in Andrew Hall.
 
 

20. 11월 27일

182
27th. Sunday. A bright day.
 
183
Bro. Fr. Eax preached a missionary sermon. Attended S.S. as usual.
184
Took supper at Miss Emie's house. Unquestionably hers is the best boarding house in Oxford for16.00. There are about 21 boys in her house.
185
So the dreaded comet which, some prophecied would strike our planet and bring the world to an end, has passed by. It is a wonder how people living in a country so highly intelligent as this should believe in tales as glaring as the tails of a comet.
186
On Friday last the negroes in Lithonia would not do anything but church going to get prepared for the last day of the world.
187
Pain (as a rule) is a healthy indication of an unhealthy condition.
188
Wrote to Mrs. Annie McClure.
 
 

21. 11월 29일

190
29th. Tuesday. A cold and lovely day.
 
191
Last night finished reading the Jap. "Life of Buddha." In it I read some of the most puerile, miserable, absurd stuffs recorded as deeds or doctrines of Buddha. Few things seem to be facts:-
192
1. There did live such a man as Shidats.
193
2. He was a prince of an Indian Kingdom.
194
3. He was eminently virtuous in whom the sense of pity and compassion was highly developed.
195
4. He forsook the pomp and pleasures of an oriental court for the search after truth, and when he got what he thought to be the truth he preached it to save men from ignorance.
196
The story abounds in contradictions. The chief of which is that Shidats whose doctrine is absolute annihilism (Nirvana) should be represented to have been born into a heavenly being after his death. The book is so full of absurdities that nothing but my desire to keep up my Japanese language made me to read it through. Yet, having done so, I feel paid.
197
To an average Christian marriage is a potent means of grace in keeping his mind free from carnal thoughts.
198
Studied geometry with Boland and Pearson in Andrew Hall From 8:30 till 11 p.m. A cold but beautiful moon-lit night.
199
Some preachers seem to be laziness unto the Lord more than holiness unto the Lord. Miss Julia Tucker said once that the laziness and general no-accountness of a preacher who used to live near her did more harm to her sisters than anything.
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