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◈ 윤치호일기 (1890년) ◈

◇ 2월 ◇

해설목차  1권  2권 3권  4권  5권  6권  7권  8권  9권  10권  11권  12권  윤치호

1. 2월 1일 (음 1월 12일)

1
1st. (12th). Saturday. Rained whole day.
 
2
Hair cut. Fretted this morning for no better reason than that a man came to borrow my Ben Hur(!) . When shall I be able to get rid of this peevishness? Lent him the book with apparent good will though in heart I hated to lend it. Is this right? with Baker and Jordan went to Dr. Hoss' from 8 and came back at 10:30. Miss Oglie and Mrs. Hoss were very kind. Played word-making cards and Halma. Miss Oglie was witty in putting the names of the four player in one sentence; viz. O(Oglie) be (Baker) Ye (Yun) joyful (Jordan) .
 

2. 2월 2일 (음 1월 13일)

1
2nd. (13th). Sunday. Fair.
 
2
Felt weak. Attended S.S. and Church in the morning. Taught the class in the Penitentiary. Attended a prayer meeting held by some of the West End young people in Mr. Hill's. Nothing to be gained by attending such places, unless I know the native customs. In the night went to the First Baptist Church. Heard a fine sermon; and witnessed the baptism of 7 girls and 3 boys. The ceremony somehow or other impressed me much and called forth my sincere prayers for the newly received members of that church. Came back exceeding tired. Had a soft moon.
 

3. 2월 3일 (음 1월 14일)

1
3rd. (14th). Monday. a lovely day indeed.
 
2
University exercises began. This evening while talking about the vastness of the universe, Woodward said he could not see the use of so many stars on the part of God. Told him that nor can a poor man, with a nickel or two in his pocket, see the use of rich man's millions. Have a beautiful night. 70 degrees this evening at the north side of the Hall.
 

4. 2월 4일 (음 1월 15일)

1
4th. (15th). Tuesday. A fine spring day.
 
2
Men often, nay, always profess indifference to praise or contempt. I don't believe this. He is either more or less than a man whom no praise or contempt can affect. At least I am far from being indifferent to the way in which men treat me. Am sensitive to the slightest insult or kindness. Need not affect to be indifferent. Only thing I should do is to study to govern myself, keeping various passions under subjection. This self-control is of course different from indifference. Had a beautiful night.
 

5. 2월 5일 (음 1월 16일)

1
5th. (16th). Wednesday. Gloomy and warm.
 
2
Felt weak all day long. I wish I had some home news-happy home news.
 

6. 2월 6일 (음 1월 17일)

1
6th. (17th). Thursday. Rained all day. 40° F.
 
2
Tonight I saw my examination in Syst. Theology published in Wesleyan Advocate with a comment from Dr. Tillet. He said that the answers in the examination are satisfactory, and that the fact a Corean can present such an examination paper answers the question, "Is a heathen worth educating?" A condescending comment! Well, at any rate, I am glad I did in that examination better than I expected. I had so bad a headache when I stood that examination that I thought I would "bust" as sure as I was ill-prepared in the book.
 

7. 2월 7일 (음 1월 18일)

1
7th. (18th). Friday. Rained all day long.
 
2
Attended a part of Mr. Sampson's lecture on Greece. He is Presbyterian missionary. He said that the Greeks have always been, as a people baptized heathens; that they talk a great deal about the procession of the Spirit, but they have not the Spirit in their hearts; that the missionary labor among them is hard; and that this difficulty arises from the union of the state and the Church. A Greek convert to evangelical faith is considered by the government as a traitor.
3
After supper went to the Cumberland Presbyterian Church there to attend a monthly missionary meeting. The subject was Corea, and I was invited to make a talk on the subject. Rain made the meeting very poorly attended. Gave them a few minutes' address on Corea and answered some questions they asked. Then they had some refreshment. Came back at about 10:30. The pastor was blunt in manner, but seemed kind in heart. My talk tonight was very cold. how can it be otherwise? Corea is the subject I hate most to talk about. There is not a single thing, either in the past history or the present condition or the future possibility of Corea, that can warm me up with national pride-the most excusable of all prides-or enthusiastic hope. Poor Corea! A fair and rich country she is; but she is poor and despised by being under the government of an uncivilized people. Nor is there any prospect of her deliverance from the present condition, so long as the government neglect the education of the people. Snowed in the night.
 

8. 2월 8일 (음 1월 19일)

1
8th. (19th). Saturday.
 
2
Snow covers the ground everywhere-a pretty scenery. Very cold. The prayer meeting tonight was conducted by Nolen. By the way, he seems to be in bad order among the class (Middle year) . His greediness or his success in examinations may be the cause of this unpopularity
 

9. 2월 9일 (음 1월 20일)

1
9th. (20th). Sunday. Cold, bright.
 
2
Attended S.S. Dr. Kirkland this morning said to the S.S. class that he believed miracles because he believed Christ, and not vice versa. With Jacob went to the 1st Cumberland Presbyterian Church and heard the pastor preach a denominational sermon. He dwelt, at some length, on the doctrinal differences which compelled the founders of his Church to separate from Presbyterian communion. In their view concerning the foreknowledge of God, the conditional and universal salvation of the race and the efficiency of divine grace to all men, the Cumberland Presbyterians come nearer to Methodists than to Calvinists. Taught the S.S. class in the Pen; then took a walk with Jacob until supper. Wish I had some kind and sympathetic friends, among the fair sex who may cheer me up in seasons of melancholy and dejection.
 

10. 2월 10일 (음 1월 21일)

1
10th. (21st). Monday. Frosty in the morning. 25° F.
 
2
This morning Dr. Tillet told me to make plans for another year's stay. He said he would help me out in pecuniary matters. Thanks to God.
 

11. 2월 11일 (음 1월 22일)

1
11th. (22d). Tuesday. A lovely day.
 
2
Felt very weak in body and depressed in spirit. Received a letter from Bell; a nice letter it was. Had to go to bed immediately after supper.
 

12. 2월 12일 (음 1월 23일)

1
12th. (23d). Wednesday.
 
2
Got up at 4 a.m. From this day I shall try gymnasium and see if it will not do me some good. Had a very fair day.
 

13. 2월 13일 (음 1월 24일)

1
13th. (24th). Thursday. A fair day and stormy night.
 
2
Felt exceeding weak.
 

14. 2월 14일 (음 1월 25일)

1
14th. (25th). Friday. A fair day.
 
2
Attended Wesley H. Monthly Missionary Meeting. Dr. Tillet delivered a lecture on Japan. He said the Japanese are a better race than the Chinese. Yes, this is true in the same sense that the Japanese alphabet is better than Chinese characters. That is, though the Japanese alphabet is easier to learn and master, it was literally derived from Chinese characters; though it is better suited to practical purposes, no one can deny that the Chinese literature is by a vast deal superior to that of Japan. In a similar way, the Japanese are more progressive than, but not as profound as, the Chinese. Moreover one should not, if he is candid and unbiased, forget that Japanese learned everything from Chinese in politics, literature, philosophy, and arts; that the Chinese are under different circumstances than the Japanese; in short one should consider these things first before pronouncing in favor of one or the other race. Time will soon come, however, when people will have better opinions about China and its people.
3
The immigration of the Chinese laborers into America has done a great deal toward arousing the prejudices of the Americans against the Chinese. There are two sides in this question, the American side and the Chinese side.
4
1. Nothing seems to me more absurd and foolish for anyone than to be deceived by the boastful pretensions of the Americans to "the inalienable right" of liberty of man. Their orators, preachers, poets and statesmen talk much about the equality, liberty and fraternity of men. But in practice the Americans have shown that their doctrine of equality etc. etc. is only skin deep. That is if you want to enjoy the so-called inalienable right of man in this "Land of Freedom" you must be white. The persecution of the Chinese in the West, the treatment of the Negro in the South, and the dealing with the Indian by the whole nation are fair commentaries on the bragged about "American doctrine" of the "inalienable right of man". I do not blame, for a moment, the national or racial prejudice of the Americans. But I do blame the perfect inconsistency between their acts full of the basest prejudice and their doctrine full of the loftiest and never to be realized catholicity.
5
To make my meaning plain, I do not blame the Americans for excluding the Chinese for the following reasons:
6
1st. The Chinese is altogether and emphatically a foreigner to the Americans. With his fossilized oriental traditions in private and public life, the Chinese is a hard element to be assimilated into the social and political usages and doctrines of the Americans. I shall blame the Americans for excluding the Chinese, when my stomach can comfortably admit some indigestible substances-such as pebbles.
7
2nd. The Chinese immigrants who come to America are necessarily the offscouring of the Empire. Their superstition, ignorance, insensibility to national shame, want of personal ambition in addition to their un-docility-these are certainly very poor qualifications for anyone who wishes to become a citizen of an enlightened republic.
 
8
A few words on the Chinese side of the question:
9
Let theorists, speculators, orators and fools say what they may, the principle that practically and actually rules this world is not right but might. "Might is Right" is the god of this world. Now, has China the might to support the right of the Chinese in America? Then do it. Then compel the Americans to grant to Chinese the same right of immigration which Germany or Russia or Ireland enjoy; if not, if China has not this might, if China can not compel the Americans to practice their doctrine of the "inalienable right of man" toward the Chinese; then let the Chinese stop the immigration. To know how to be weak is full as good as to know how to be strong. This is true in an individual as well as in a nation. Nay, so far as I can see the Exclusion Bill is as much beneficial to China as to America. This Bill will save the latter from the presence of indigestible elements in her population; and also will save the former from being further disgraced by another such Bill.
10
Went to bed little later than usual.
 

15. 2월 15일 (음 1월 26일)

1
15th. (26th). Saturday. Warm and fair.
 
2
Attended a lecture by Dr. Haygood in the W.H. Chapel. He gave some very good advice to the boys on preaching; the points he insisted on were: (1) "Don't carry your theological terms into your popular sermons." He cited an instance where a young man fresh from school startled a homely congregation by saying "Justification is a forensic term." (2) "Know the subject you preach." (3) "Don't soil your discourse by slang." (4) "Say your best to a small or poor audience as well as to a large or rich one." (5) "Let not your thought wander about; but learn to master your thought."
3
Dr. Haygood is said to be an eminent man in the South. He is the sister[sic]of Miss Haygood, Shanghai.
 

16. 2월 16일 (음 1월 27일)

1
16th. (27th). Sunday. A beautiful day.
 
2
Attended S.S. and heard Dr. Haygood preach in the West End Church. This was the first time I attended the new Church since it had been dedicated some weeks ago. The new West End Church was erected at the cost of the5500 and is one of the handsomest Churches in the city. Taught the class in Pen. S.S. Took a walk with Jacob from Vanderbilt as far as to the Park Ave. Church. Received a letter from Bro. E. J. Poe.
 

17. 2월 17일 (음 1월 28일)

1
17th. (28th). Monday. A fair but windy day.
 
2
Received letters from Dr. Allen, Henry and also from Lambuth. Had the great joy of reading a letter from Mother and Father. The letter was dated nearly a year ago. But that is better than no letter. Thanks to Mr. Appenzeller who kindly sent the home letter. His letter was dated the 14th of the last month.
3
Took a cold bath this afternoon 5:30-a testimony to the warmness of the day.
 

18. 2월 18일 (음 1월 29일)

1
18th. (29th). Tuesday. A warm and fair day.
 
 

19. 2월 19일 (음 2월 1일)

1
19th. (1st of 2d moon). Wednesday. Warm-cloudy-windy, all day long.
 
2
This morning Chancellor Garland, in urging the boys to attend the public exercises of the literary societies, said "Feeling was not meant to guide our duties. Then we would neglect many duties. We should be guided by reason and conscience". A very good precept. But the trouble is that the members of the Faculty do not teach this precept by their example. When the boys had a public debate last November there was only one professor present.
3
Busted on the Examination (Monthly) in Logic this afternoon. What's matter with me?
 

20. 2월 20일 (음 2월 2일)

1
20th. (2d). Thursday. Cold-cloudy, 32° F. this afternoon.
 
2
The "Anglo-Saxon Reader" made me mad this morning. The genders, cases and numbers of the O.E. are the worst thing I ever had the bad luck to deal with. Dr. Baskerville said that the irregularity and inconsistency of the spelling and pronunciation of English cost the U.S. nearly a hundred million dollars a year, as children have to be kept in schools longer than in other countries in order to teach them one way of spelling and another way of pronouncing. For example what can be more inconsistent than to write "boat" and "bought" and pronounce them alike, or to write "scheme" and "schism" and pronounce them differently?
 

21. 2월 21일 (음 2월 3일)

1
21st. (3d). Friday. Cold and fair. 22° F. this morning.
 
2
Hair cut. Learned that I got 82 in the Intermediate Examination in Psychology. I did not expect this much. Wrote a letter to Poe.
 

22. 2월 22일 (음 2월 4일)

1
22nd. (4th). Saturday. Cold and cloudy. Rained from 3 p.m. and all night.
 
2
Had a big dinner in the Hall on account of this being the anniversary of Washington's birthday. Had a holiday. Wrote letters to Dr. Allen, Professor Bonnell, Henry, Liang Kiun Foo. Spent nearly 3 hours in conversation with Dr. Hashimoto.
 

23. 2월 23일 (음 2월 5일)

1
23rd. (5th). Sunday. Rainy.
 
2
This morning in reading "The Sunday School Time" found these valuable suggestions on Bible reading by Bishop Cyrus Foss:
3
1. Read the Bible regularly every day.
4
2. As nearly as possible at a fixed hour.
5
3. Alone in your room.
6
4. Never when in haste.
7
5. The morning is the best time; or immediately before retirement.
8
6. Read in course.
9
7. Select, in addition such passages as you specially need.
10
8. From time to time read largely, several chapters at a sitting.
 
11
After having taught the S.S class in the Pen. took a walk-a delightful one-with Jacob. In the night, spent about two hours with Jacob in practicing hymns. This afternoon a colored man in my class said the Chinese who work in Memphis are crazy with colored women. A glorious comment on the social standing of a Chinaman here! No wonder he is so despised.
 

24. 2월 24일 (음 2월 6일)

1
24th. (6th). Monday. Disagreeably warm, repeated showers all day long.
 
2
In talking last night with Bruce and Hearn, I said that the smile of a lady is generally hypocritical. A very sweeping and thoughtless remark this is. For a lady's smile is no more hypocritical than ordinary courtesy or politeness is. True, our courtesy is not always sincere: we tell a man "I am glad to see you" or "I enjoyed your conversation or talk very much", while we think quite otherwise. Yet who can deny that our courtesy or politeness makes social relations run happy and smooth as oil does a wheel? this being so why should we call the smile of a lady-a brightest ornament of a woman-hypocrisy? However, courtesy is curse and smile is sin when courtesy and smile are used to conceal revenge or hatred or treachery.
 

25. 2월 25일 (음 2월 7일)

1
25th. (7th). Tuesday. Warm, showers repeated.
 
2
Studied Logic from 7:30 to 1:30 in the night, but got very little out of it.
 

26. 2월 26일 (음 2월 8일)

1
26th. (8th). Wednesday. A fair day.
 
2
At 7:30 went to Vendon to see the commencement exercises of the Medical Department. Dr. Hashimoto and Dr. Lipscomb, the brother of Mrs. Walters, were only two whom I know. The presence of many hoary heads among the Faculty made the gathering an impressive one. With what mingled sympathy. love and pity these good old men must have looked up on the aspirations and hopes and inexperience of the young men whom they were now sending out into the activities of the world! Felt very tired-rained hard all the night.
 

27. 2월 27일 (음 2월 9일)

1
27th. (9th). Thursday. Cloudy and warm 58° F. in the morning. Rained all day long.
 
2
Received a litter from Mrs. Walters and another from Mr. Abe. This morning Dr. Hashimoto said that a new graduate (of a medical college) thinks he can cure every disease before he kills a patient. The truth is a M.D. fresh from the college is not M.D. at all. Only through failures and bitter disappointments of many tedious years he can acquire real medical knowledge and command the confidence of the public. The Doctor is very sensible to make this remark. By the way, he is a good and interesting talker. But he seems to mistake cunning and dissimulation for wisdom and sagacity. In this world of alloys, however, a man of mixed moral character succeeds better than one of purer morality. So Dr. Hashimoto will be successful in his life. Felt so worn out that I went to bed 4:45.
 

28. 2월 28일 (음 2월 10일)

1
28th. (10th). Friday. Cloudy and cold. 30° F. in the morning and 24 degrees in the evening.
 
2
At 7:30 attended the Welcome Meeting of the Y.M.C.A. convention met in this university. Dr. Steele addressed the boys. He said that a witness in a law court must know what he testifies. So a Christian must know the love and power of Christ before he can bear them witness to the world.
3
This afternoon in a Missionary Monthly was informed of the death of Rev. Neesima, the President of Doshisha, Japan. At first I could not believe my own eyes: the event was so unexpected! God bless his bereaved family and his College! Man may come, man may go, but God's work goes on forever. Am glad that I had the honor and good fortune of meeting him before his death. He told me at my first and-alas!-last interview with him on my way to America, that I must win the confidence of those under whom or among whom I might be placed, not by feigned or eye-serving conduct but by real and solid character.
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  메인화면 (다빈치!지식놀이터) :: 다빈치! 원문/전문 > 기록물 > 개인기록물 해설목차  1권  2권 3권  4권  5권  6권  7권  8권  9권  10권  11권  12권  영문  수정

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