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◈ 윤치호일기 (1890년) ◈

◇ 6월 ◇

해설목차  1권  2권  3권  4권  5권  6권 7권  8권  9권  10권  11권  12권  윤치호

1. 6월 1일 (음 4월 14일)

1
1st. (14th). Sunday. Fair but hot.
 
2
Attended the W.E. S.S. and heard Dr. Steele's commencement sermon to the Dr. Price's young ladies. He preached on Providence.
3
Taught the Pen. S.S.; thence went to the Gospel Tent to hear Sam Jones. He preached a most uncompromising sermon on various evils-swearing, drinking, licentiousness and gambling-to a Tent full of men. He took up some thousands of collection for the completion of the Tabernacle on whose foundation the Tent stands.
 

2. 6월 2일 (음 4월 15일)

1
2nd. (15th). Monday. Cloudy and unpleasant morning.
 
2
Cool evening and rainy night.
3
Final Examination on the History of Preaching under Dr. Martin. From this day I shall be busy all the week for reviewing.
 

3. 6월 3일 (음 4월 16일)

1
3rd. (16th). Tuesday. Warm.
 
2
Reviewed.
 

4. 6월 4일 (음 4월 17일)

1
4th. (17th). Wednesday.
 
2
Reviewed.
 

5. 6월 5일 (음 4월 18일)

1
5th. (18th). Thursday.
 
2
Reviewed.
 

6. 6월 6일 (음 4월 19일)

1
6th. (19th). Friday.
 
2
Reviewed.
 

7. 6월 7일 (음 4월 20일)

1
7th. (20th). Saturday.
 
2
Final examination in Logic. one of the hardest I have-barely escaped a total bust. Reviewed.
 

8. 6월 8일 (음 4월 21일)

1
8th. (21st). Sunday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Attended the West Side S.S. and the sermon. in the p.m. taught the Pen. S.S. As to the Sabbath observance my opinion has not been definite. I put down the following resolutions to be observed until I be more enlightened on the subject:
3
Since all God's commandments are accompanied with our good and happiness: since He has told us to keep one day out of 7 as a day of rest and religious exercises; since all experience testifies the benefit of such a rest to body and mind; and since "The Sabbath is made for man and not man for the Sabbath";
4
let it be resolved:
5
1. That the Day should be a day of bodily and mental rest from the ordinary week day work;
6
2. That the Day should be no hinderance to the performance or works of mercy and necessity and religion;
7
3. That sports for amusement should not be indulged in;
8
4. That good books, either for edification or recreation, decent conversation; ordinary letter-writing-not commercial;-these are consistent with Sabbath keeping;
9
5. That street cars or any other public conveyances may be used, but not for mere amusement;
10
6. That al selling and buying that may be done on Saturdays or Mondays should not be done at all;
11
7. That servants and animals should be given as much rest on the Day as possible.
 

9. 6월 9일 (음 4월 22일)

1
9th. (22d). Monday. Cloudy. Rained in the night.
 
2
Final examination in English.
3
Notwithstanding the exhortation and entreat and above all, the example of the venerable Chancellor, Garland, for the regular attendance to the morning Chapel most boys, specially as the vacation draws nigh, neglect the duty. The members of the Faculty with one or two exceptions set bad example to the boys for the neglect of this duty, I do not think they are right.
 

10. 6월 10일 (음 4월 23일)

1
10th. (23d). Tuesday. Rained at intervals. Cool.
 
2
Reviewed. Theology.
 

11. 6월 11일 (음 4월 24일)

1
11th. (24th). Wednesday. Hot, but windy.
 
2
This morning just before going into the Final examination in Theology, Dr. Tillet asked humorously "Are you ready to enter into the tribulation (the Examination) ?" The Examination was long but not so hard as I feared. I think I came out of the tribulation tolerably well-I do not know, though.
3
Felt very light and free; all the finals are over now. At 7:30 p.m. supped with Dr. Tillet. Mrs. Klein,-a very sweet little lady she is-and Klein were there. The Dr. was very social and we had the nicest time of it. After supper, Mr. Tarbaux, a Brazilian missionary, called on Dr. T. and in course of conversation Dr. T. had the occasion of stating his opinions concerning Bruce and Dickson, Rawlings and Wilson.
4
The substance was thus:
5
"Bruce and Dickson, both are sincere and good boys. But B. has been a better scholar than D. and B will make a better teacher. Both, however, lack animation and enthusiasm. But I hope, I am confident that there are much in them that will 'come out' by actual contact with the world.
6
"Wilson, Ah, Wilson is a capital fellow. he will make a fine everything. I wish to see him join N.C. Conference. There he has good work to do. Rawlings is a capital fellow. in fact these two have been among the very best of our boys.
7
"But we have never had a boy so fine as Brown. He is going to China as a missionary. he will make a best missionary. He is the best of all the boys we have yet had"
8
The Doctor's opinion on these boys agree with my private judgment. Wilson is kindhearted and studious with my private judgment. Wilson is kindhearted and studious man. No one in the whole establishment has been so kind to the sick, so sympathetic with the trials of others than this boy. But Rawlings I admire and disapprove at the same time. Perhaps in brightness and ability and tact he is superior to any boy in the Hall. Yet he is self-conceited. With all his out-ward politeness and profession, his insincerity to those whom he thinks to be his inferior mortals,-and very few seem to deserve hearty confidence and real earnest sympathy in his eyes-is often revolting. I have long quit consulting him in things vital to me: I am so inferior to him.
9
After all, R. may be mistaken,-I hope, nay, really I often think he is-in his notions of politeness. Time and experience may show him his fault. He is nevertheless a good and earnest Christian. His success in life is, so far as ability goes, a certain thing.
10
For the past four or five months, I have had the pleasure and opportunity of forming a most close intimacy with J.Y. Bruce. He is modest and very honest man, with kind and really sympahetic heart. I love him, and I hope he does not dislike me. Whatever harsh feeling I might have formed in regard to his indifference to those in trouble I take all back: his indifference being the result of his unenthusiastic temper rather than of his heart. When I said to him tonight that I was very sorry as we were to part before long; that it pained me to be separated from one, with Spencer, whom I regarded my best friends when I said all this, I professed no more than I felt.
11
Tonight Dr. Tillet told Mr. Tarbaux, "I expect Mr. Yun to do great good in his life. If he does not, I shall be disappointed". May my life be such in the hand of God, as not to disappoint those who have interest and expectations in my usefulness.
12
Went to bed at 12 p.m.
 

12. 6월 12일 (음 4월 25일)

1
12th. (25th). Thursday. A fine and warm day.
 
2
At 4 to 7 started with Baker for the Lower Landing. There we got on board of a river steamer which was hired by the Newtown picknick parties. At 7:30 we steamed down the Cumberland which gracefully winds its yellow way between pretty wooded shores. About 3 hours voyage landed the parties on a wild place called Harris Spring.
3
Baker and I did not know anybody in the whole crowd; and as we did not want to intrude on any party, we really had nothing to do with the dinnering part of the excursion. Nevertheless we, specially I, enjoyed the change-the river. the woods, hills and rocks. We started from the Spring-by the way, the name of the place seems to have been derived from a sulpher Spring there-at 2:30 p.m. for home. Reached Nashville at about 20 minutes past 6.
4
The crowd was composed of several distinct parties; and except the Newtown S.S. party-a decent party led by the pastor. Rev. R. and a few individuals, the crowd was characterized by the frivolities and gigglings of would-be, but never-will-be, beaus and belles. On the returning trip the following accident happened:
5
I was standing on the front of the deck, leaning on an iron rod joined with another by screws. My coat, either by accident or by the mischief of some one of the fools near by, was caught in the arm between the screws. My struggle to free myself from this awkward position hugely pleased the swains and swainesses. They howled, joked, laughed, jabbered, clapped and danced calling on their neighbors to rejoice with them. I was indignant, but of course, when I started this morning, I did not expect to receive much courtesy. I told them "Gentlemen, I am glad that it (refering to the accident) has given you so much pleasure". A short while afterward, a young lady-pretty, indeed-was at my side. I did not pay any attention; but she introduced herself to me as Mrs. Shepherd. She said that she had been looking for me the whole afternoon knowing that I was lonesome. "My husband," said she, "is a Swede, a foreigner. That makes me specially partial to foreigners."
6
Then she went on talking about Miss Fitzgerald, whom she admired much; Mrs. Fitz., whom she called the most motherly and lovely woman she ever saw; Dr. Fitz. whose sermons she said to be too sensational; Sam Jones, whom she did not like; and about the Rev. R. The Methodist pastor in Newtown, whom she considered to be the best preacher she ever heard. When some old jades, who seemed to be surprised at this conversation between us, threw pieces of coke and cork, Mrs. S. called to them and said "If you knew who my husband is, you would not do this".
7
She seemed to be rather a free thinker-not in bad sense-in religious matters. She said that Nashville was prostrate under religious prejudices, that she liked the Catholic nuns dearly, and that she and her husband had made up their minds not to hear boring or dull preachers. When I said that a bad preacher may do good by good life, she said, "Yes, but every Christian ought to live a good life yet without boring others by stupid sermons".
8
On the standard novels of Scott, Thackeray, George Elliot etc., she gave liberal commendation. "I am very fond of reading", she said, "I read from the best books to the worst books".
9
I appreciated her kindness very heartily. I do not think there is another such lady-young, pretty, and well read-in the whole Nashville who would have so freely talked with me in the crowd in defiance to the narrow racial prejudices of the people.
10
Reached W.H. little before 7. Hot in the night. Went to bed worn and tired.
 

13. 6월 13일 (음 4월 26일)

1
13th. (26th). Friday. Fair and hot.
 
2
This morning wrote a letter to Mrs. Shepherd thus:
3
"Dear Madam; your gracious attention and unprejudiced kindness, which would have been welcome to any stranger at any time, were indeed gratified and refreshing to me yesterday, a stranger among the worst imaginable crowd-the crowd of would-be beaus and belles. I mean the little company of coxcombs who were around me on the deck. Ten thousand thanks for your kindnesses.
4
"Our vacation will begin from the 19th Inst. I shall soon have the pleasure of hearing the Rev. R.-whose merit must be real to have the commendation of a judge like you. etc. etc. etc."
 

14. 6월 14일 (음 4월 27일)

1
14th. (27th). Saturday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Read Macaulay's History. Wrote to Miss Muse.
 

15. 6월 15일 (음 4월 28일)

1
15th. (28th). Sunday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Dr. Atkins preached a commencement sermon in the university chapel. I did not enjoy the service very much.
3
Taught the Pen. S.S. as usual.
4
In the night a Missionary Farewell Meeting was held in West End Chapel. Dr. Tillet presided. Bruce and Dickson, missionaries to Brazil, Brown and Hearn to China, made short and appropriate remarks or farewell addresses. The meeting was a good one throughout.
5
Dr. T. said tonight in the meeting:
6
"I shall be glad to see our school produce great pulpit orators and Biblical scholars. But I shall be far more proud of, and grateful for, our institution if it will gain the enviable distincion of having sent out more missionaries than orators and scholars."
 

16. 6월 16일 (음 4월 29일)

1
16th. (29th). Monday. Hot. A short vigorous shower in the afternoon.
 
2
Bought a suit of clothes ($13) .
 

17. 6월 17일 (음 5월 1일)

1
17th. (1st of 5th moon). Tuesday. Fair and hot.
 
2
At 11 a.m. the contest for Green's medal came off. Hearn got the prize. I do not think I shall ever win the medal so long as the judges are severe on my foreign pronunciation and accent.
3
Bishop Haygood addressed the literary societies in the night. His speech was solid, decorated as usual with the eulogies on America and its people and its resources and its possibilities etc.
 

18. 6월 18일 (음 5월 2일)

1
18th. (2d). Wednesday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Today is the Commencement day. At 10 a.m., the boys formed a procession headed by the trustees. A band of music led the way with martial air. The procession marched from W.H. to the Chapel where the exercises came off.
3
Washington Moore, the best of the academic department delivered an address on the Importance of Philosophy. He lamented and denounced the decay of social morals, the venality of politicians, the dishonesty of merchants, the luxury and degeneracy of the Church, the universal love of money and self, and the prevalence of gross materialism. As the remedy of all these evils, he strongly emphasized the importance of the study of "Divine philosophy". Christianity, the called a "dying faith". His speech was characterized by pessimism.
4
The Biblical Department was represented by its best student, D.H. Rawlings. His subject was "Purpose for Enthusiasm". In contrast to Moore, R. took the brighter side of the world. He said that enthusiasm without controlling purpose is energy wasted, but purpose with enthusiasm is power invincible.
5
By about 12:30 all the exercises came to and end and with it the scholastic year of 1889-1890. This year was pronounced by the venerable Chancellor to be the best the University has yet had.
6
It was sad to part with Brother Rawlings, perhaps forever. I wept, nay sobbed, with my arms around his neck. This shows that I loved him better than I imagined. He assured me of his sympathy, cooperation and prayer for me and my work; and asked my prayers on his behalf. I promised I would, and I mean to keep this promise.
7
Wesley Hall will miss him much.
8
Went to the Bilbo Ave. Church to hear Jordan preach. Came back at 9:30. The W.H. summer club began today.
 

19. 6월 19일 (음 5월 3일)

1
19th. (3d). Thursday. Cloudy and unpleasantly hot from the early morning.
 
2
Received a letter from Spencer. Answered him.
3
Very hot-windless-all day long.
 

20. 6월 20일 (음 5월 4일)

1
20th. (4th). Friday. Fair and hot.
 
2
This morning went down to the Depot to see Brother Bruce and Baker off. Brother Brown and Wilson left the Hall after supper.
 

21. 6월 21일 (음 5월 5일)

1
21st. (5th). Saturday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Read Macaulay's History and Ben Hur. Wrote to Dr. Allen and Professor B. and Dr. Hashimoto.
 

22. 6월 22일 (음 5월 6일)

1
22nd. (6th). Sunday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Attended the W.E. Chapel in the a.m. Taught the Pens S.S. in the p.m.
 

23. 6월 23일 (음 5월 7일)

1
23rd. (7th). Monday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Read Ben Hur as much as the hot day gave me desire and spirit to read.
3
In the p.m. a short but refreshing shower. preceded by a strong windstorm. was welcome
 

24. 6월 24일 (음 5월 8일)

1
24th. (8th). Tuesday. Fair and hot. Wind considerably modified the heat.
 
2
Finished Ben Hur. From my personal circumstance, I have a strong sympathy and partiality for Ben Hur.
3
Went to bed early.
 

25. 6월 25일 (음 5월 9일)

1
25th. (9th). Wednesday. Fair and hot. A refreshing shower in the afternoon.
 
2
My love for solitude seems to have become a second nature. The presence of anyone, but the most intimate friend, is oppressive. To be thrown in the company of stranger or of ladies is a torture. Am sorry for this morbid state of mind; it deprives me of the enjoyment of society-a source of pleasure and profit.
3
This morning, I was surprised to find that according to my diary, today should be the 28th of a "Moon" (Corean style) instead of being the 8th or 9th of a new month as indicated by the beautiful moon we had last night. A brief investigation showed that I had put down the 17th where it ought to have been the 27th; hence the mistake.
4
Doesn't this illustrate:
5
1. That God's laws, unchangeable, work independent of our errors.
6
2. That, whenever God's laws seem to contradict our opinions, we should first try to see if our opinions are not built on some wrong basis?
7
Read Macaulay's Hist.
 

26. 6월 26일 (음 5월 10일)

1
26th. (10th). Thursday. Fair and hot. 96° F. Beautiful moon and night.
 
2
Read all the morning.
 

27. 6월 27일 (음 5월 11일)

1
27th. (11th). Friday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Read.
 

28. 6월 28일 (음 5월 12일)

1
28th. (12th). Saturday. Fair and hot. 97° F.
 
2
Finished Mac's History.
 

29. 6월 29일 (음 5월 13일)

1
29th. (13th). Sunday. Fair and hot.
 
2
Attended W.E. Chapel service
3
Bro. Perry preached a fine sermon.
4
Taught the Pen. S.S.
5
Beautiful moon and night.
 

30. 6월 30일 (음 5월 14일)

1
30th. (14th). Monday. Fair and hot. Wind modified the heat.
 
2
Read some of Ingersoll's short pieces. His constant ranting about liberty, truth, justice, humanity-love, political purity, social morality, -wearies and finally disgusts me as much as the canting pretensions of a sanctimonious hypocrite seem to have wearied and disgusted him.
3
Found out that the real population of Nashville is about 72,000 instead of 100,000.
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